Predator: Ultimate Hunter Edition Blu-Ray Review

Arnie gets a raw deal in the Blu-ray transfer of a classic SF/horror thriller...

The Film

It’s interesting, the things that come to be declared “classics.” Have no doubt – I am firmly in the “just because you liked it when you were a kid does not make it a classic” camp, so when it came time to finally sit down and watch Predator, I was alternately excited (mainly for the John McTiernan aspect, being a big fan of Die Hard and Die Hard: With a Vengeance) and extremely cautious (as Arnold tends to only work for me as a robot or uncredited heavy in a Robert Altman film, and Carl Weathers is just plain silly).

But I’ll be damned if that wasn’t a fine film, certainly a classic of the monster movie if not action as a whole. It starts out as probably the perfect representation of 80s action – awful one-liners, biceps like you wouldn’t believe, and nary an interesting woman in sight – but soon evolves into a really tense, totally awesome showdown between a group of soldiers and a monster they can’t wrap their head around. Those last thirty minutes are, given the set up, perfect. McTiernan’s still learning his way around directing, but he uses zooms like a beast and has successfully created some deservedly iconic imagery here.

"Fox chose to scrub the film of all its grain (read to the uninformed as “noise”), which, sure, makes it look “sleeker” in a sense. But you also lose a lot of definition, especially to the actors’ faces, which now more closely resemble wax or clay than skin"

The Video

And here’s where we get into trouble.

You’ll hear the uneducated say that Blu-Ray is only fit for modern films, which has some factual basis even if they don’t realize it (the digital intermediate process means that modern films are “locked” digitally, so a Blu-Ray transfer is actually more natural than scanning it back onto film). However, when treated right, films made before this era can look spectacular – they just have to be treated like film.

Predator was not. Instead, Fox chose to scrub the film of all its grain (read to the uninformed as “noise”), which, sure, makes it look “sleeker” in a sense. But you also lose a lot of definition, especially to the actors’ faces, which now more closely resemble wax or clay than skin. The jungle frequently looks like it’s made of plastic. Any shadows are muddied, robbed of their definition (the black levels vary in intensity, but are too often marked by a strong outline). They’ve tried to make a film made in 1987 look like something shot on HD video today, which is impossible. I’ve heard that it looks like low-rent video, but as someone who has used low-rent video, I can tell you it really doesn’t look like that either (a few notable shots aside). At its best moments, this transfer doesn’t even look as good as an episode of Lost. At its worst, it just looks…awful.

And more importantly, it’s dishonest. It is not an accurate representation of how Predator has ever looked, and by trying to turn it into something it’s not, Fox has created a version of Predator that looks worse than any film of any era should ever look.

The Audio

On the other hand, the disc sounds FANTASTIC. Even if the jungle doesn’t look like a real jungle, the sound absolutely makes it come alive, with individual elements – bugs, leaves, guns, boots, dog tags, Predator noises, you name it – separated and accurately placed in such a way that it just immerses you in this environment.

Extras

And if you’re a fan of extras, the disc may be worth picking up for just this alone. I understand much of this comes from previous releases, so your mileage may vary, but it’s hard to imagine a fan of the film could possibly want much more.

The big highlight of the package is not the commentary by director John McTiernan, which is more than a little on the rambling side, repeats information covered in other areas (not his fault, but still), and is less lively than the average afternoon on NPR (zing!), but rather the behind-the-scenes documentary, in all its multitude of forms. Uniquely for a film of its time, there is a ton of behind-the-scenes footage from the Predator set, and the people who put this disc together seem intent on getting every interesting bit out there, no matter what.

Most coherently, this takes the form of If It Bleeds, We Can Kill It: The Making of Predator (as a side note, sometimes it’s a good idea to use a line that makes any God damn sense when titling your documentary, but whatever), a top-to-bottom look at, as one might expect, how the film got made. As it was produced for a 2001 DVD release, they’re totally candid about the more difficult and prickly aspects of making a blockbuster in the jungle, but just as willing to share the lighter side too. If you only watch one special feature on your Predator Blu-Ray, make it this one.

From there, they dice up leftover footage into the Inside Predator section, which has short bits called “Chasing Action” (on shooting an action scene), “The Unseen Arnold” (where everyone sits around and talks about what a swell guy Arnold is), “Old Painless” (all about that big-ass Gatling gun Jesse Ventura wields like so much…well, you know), “The Life Inside: Kevin Peter Hall” (detailing the contributions of the man inside the Predator suit), “Camouflage” (using make-up for characters that are living in a jungle), “Welcome to the Jungle” (all about how the production design helped to evoke the feeling of the setting), and “Character Design” (tips and tricks for quickly establishing an ensemble). All in all, solid stuff – not as informative as the making-of, but still damn entertaining.

And then the leftover, leftover stuff gets dumped into Short Takes, which is divided into four sections, most self-explanatory – “John McTiernan on Learning Film” (this was his first studio feature), “Jesse’s Ultimate Goal” (less self-explanatory, but mostly about the absurdity that is Jesse Ventura, and how he wanted to prove he could be an actor), “Stan Winston: Practical Joker” (or more accurately, “Stan Winston: Retaliation!”), and “Don’t Drink the Water” (sound advice when in a God damn jungle).

There are Deleted Scenes and Outtakes (I think we all know the score there), Special Effects Tests for the “Red Suit” Special Effect (a guy in a red suit had to run around whenever they wanted reference for the camouflage effect) and Camouflage Tests, which are weirdly avant-garde when viewed on their own. You get Theatrical Trailers naturally, a sneak peak at the new sequel Predators (and by “sneak peak,” they mean a minute and a half about how producer Robert Rodriguez was aiming to evoke the same feelings as the original without outright copying it…way to shoot for the stars there, guy), and the newly-produced Predator: Evolution of a Species: Hunters of Extreme Perfection, the silliest-named special feature, which at once seeks to answer the magical questions “how many colons is too many colons?” and “just how awesome is Predator?” Because literally, all it is ten minutes of Rodriguez and Predators director Nimrod Antal talking about how awesome Predator is. Because God help you, you NEED successful filmmakers to remind you that you like this movie.

Penultimately, one can view a Predator Profile, which is a complete deconstruction of the titular monster. Because there can be no more mystery, dammit!

There is also a Text Commentary by Eric Lichtenfeld, which features interviews with a ton of people responsible for the film and is fan-freaking-tastic. I’d advise you to turn the sound down and maybe throw some music on, though, because if you’re anything like me, you really have to focus to separate people talking from text at the bottom when it’s all in your native tongue. So, again, your mileage may vary, but if you’re down for it, it’s a very rewarding read.

You want anything else? Tough luck. You’re stuck with hours and hours and hours of mostly awesome material (except for that McTiernan commentary…unless you really like your McTiernan). Somehow you’ll make due.

Final Thoughts

Seriously, don’t buy this. Predator is a truly awesome movie, don’t get me wrong, but why would anyone want to watch such a shoddy representation of an awesome movie? Really, if it sucked it wouldn’t be such an issue. But it doesn’t. And so it is. Give it a rent if you want to check out those special features, but the transfer is so awful that you’ll regret it living in your house, knowing in your heart of hearts that you once shelled out good money for it. About ten minutes in I texted my girlfriend, “If this is the first impression someone gets of Blu-Ray, they’ll return their player and never look back.” And that, my friends, is all there is to it.

FILM:

4 stars