Caleb finds the lack of laughs in the latest Star Wars spoof disturbing...

I found myself with a dilemma in a department store the other day. In one hand, I had Family Guy’s new Star Wars spoof, “It’s a Trap”. In the other hand, I had Metalocalypse season three. Due to price and limited funds, I put Metalocalypse back on the shelf. As mistakes go, that one was a big one.

Being a huge Star Wars geek, I’ve enjoyed the previous installments of Family Guy’s spoofs, Blue Harvest (the spoof for A New Hope) and Something, Something, Something Dark Side (the spoof for The Empire Strikes Back). However, where there was a general feeling of cast and crew interest in the previous episodes, this one lets you know right off the bat that no one had their hearts in it. We start out like the first two did, with the Griffin family sitting in front of the television, when the power goes out. Stewie glumly asks, “We’re doing Jedi, aren’t we”, to which Peter replies “Let’s just get through this”. The opening crawl even admits that this one was on the studio, and informs the audience that they should lower their expectations, because no one really put any effort into it. The sad part is, they aren’t joking. Vader (Stewie) arrives at the Death Star, and is met by Moff Jerjerrod, played by Roger, the alien from American Dad, the first of outside cameos from other MacFarlane shows. Vader even asks if they had run out of their own characters. He finds out that there might still be a weak spot in the Death Star, and informs Jerjerrod to fix it before the Emperor arrives.

C-3PO (Quagmire) and R2-D2 (Cleveland) arrive at Jabba’s palace to bargain for Han’s life. The droids comment on the number of aliens present, and how many more were added for the Special Edition, and at this point, a sock puppet pops up in front of the crowd. Seriously, a sock puppet. In fact, he makes two appearances in here. Han (Peter), who was frozen backward and mooning everybody, is still hanging in the palace. Jabba (Joe Swanson) informs them he won’t part with his favorite decoration, because it “just really ties the room together, man”. Then he says something in Huttese that ends with “double dog dare”, and a young boy walks up and licks Han’s ass, and gets stuck. These, unfortunately, are the funny jokes.

Leia (Lois) releases Han, and we are “treated” to about a half-minute fart as he thaws out. Han is imprisoned with Chewie, Luke arrives, second sock puppet appearance, Leia in gold bikini (not nearly as hot in animation form), and Luke fights the Rancor in the form of a giant Rush Limbaugh. They are taken to the Pit of Carkoon to be thrown into the Sarlacc (Meg’s token “monster” appearance). The scene is cut down, and there’s really not a lot funny about it.

Luke travels to Dagobah, talks with a dying Yoda, visits with Obi-Wan, and heads back to meet up with the rest of the gang, who have been getting the rundown from Mon Mothma (Carrie Fisher in a rare Star Wars-related cameo) and Admiral Ackbar (Klaus the fish from American Dad). The only really funny moment here is when Mon Mothma comes out and starts the debriefing, and Han points out that it’s “the only other woman in the galaxy” (a joke about how there are few substantial female characters in the original trilogy), to which Leia says “I don’t think I like her”.

There are some nice bits concerning Vader and The Emperor (Carter Pewterschmidt), but alas, they feel like missed opportunities. A few jabs at Stewie’s sexuality, another fart joke, and The Emperor having to meet a dying child for a Last Wish sort of Imperial Program, which he chastises Vader for afterward.

Our heroes travel to Endor, get past the Imperials, and land on the moon. They end up in the classic speeder bike scene, but with bicycles, one of which belongs to Pee-Wee Herman (with a Paul Reubens cameo). Leia and Luke are split up, and she is found by an Ewok, played by Tim the Bear from The Cleveland Show...

Everything pretty much plays out the way it did in the movie, just with bad jokes thrown in.

Luke goes off to meet Vader and The Emperor, and is taken up to the Death Star. The gang breaks into the bunker, and here is where the jokes go from unfunny to dark and almost crossing the line, which is where Family Guy works best. Han tells the Imperials to go outside and dig their own graves so that he can shoot them. Leia asks if that is too dark, and Han tells that there’s too much cute in this movie, and that they need something dark. As the officers are digging their graves, one starts to plead for his life, telling Han he has a family. Han hands the officer next to him a knife, and tells him to cut the other’s face off, wear it as a mask, and go to the former’s family and see how long it takes them to realize it’s not their loved one. Yeah, pretty wrong on so many levels, but one of the funnier moments.

The fleet shows up at the Death Star, only to find out the shields are still up. Lando (Mort Goldman) and Nien Nunb (Rallo Tubbs from The Cleveland Show) inform the fleet, but too late, as they are engaged by TIE fighters, and PIE fighters (TIE fighters that have pies instead of solar panels – yes, that’s right, a pie fight in outer space). The Emperor is trying to egg Luke into attacking him, and starts in about how much Seth Green sucks. In fact, this scene and one during the final lightsaber duel go on for much too long, and though it’s a good-natured ribbing between the two Seths, it just gets old after a while. The duel itself is shortened for time, and ends with Luke refusing to kill Vader, and then being tortured by the Emperor. He calls out “Father, please”, to which Vader gushes on about his good manners, and how he’s so happy that Aunt Beru and Uncle Owen taught him such manners. He throws the Emperor down the chasm, only to have him hit the windscreen of the Millennium Falcon.

The fight between the Imperials and the Ewoks is also cut down, thankfully. Jokes are made about the inefficiency of Stormtrooper armor, and the infamous scene that lingers on the body of a dead Ewok is played for laughs. This time, the other Ewok doesn’t sit and mourn, but instead tears his compatriot’s arm off to eat. Another scene has several Ewoks fall on a group of Stormtroopers, only to have them hit each other with them like pillows, and then take off their uniforms to reveal lingerie-clad girls. With Stormtrooper helmets. Having a pillow fight. Not funny, just really hot.

Luke gets Vader to a shuttle, and Vader tells him to help him take his mask off. Unfortunately, he snaps Vader’s neck in the process, and takes his body with him. The Death Star is destroyed, and everyone meets back at the Ewok village for a celebration. Luke is visited by Obi-Wan and Yoda’s spirits, who are joined by Stewie’s ghost, albeit with a broken neck. “What the hell, man,” he yells. “I was gonna make it!” Luke thanks them for looking out for him, to which Stewie yells “Fuck you!” And the story of Return of the Jedi is done.

Back in the Griffins' living room, Chris asks why there’s so much Seth Green hate. Peter says he thinks Green’s a douche. He and Lois both say that they think Seth MacFarlane is a douche, only to have the characters all voiced by him to stick up for the guy. Lois and Meg also point out that MacFarlane ripped off The Simpsons, and complain about how the DVDs are put out every year, to which Peter argues that those decisions are made on the corporate level, not by MacFarlane.

And in what only feels like they were adding insult to injury, we get crap for special features. The commentary – supplied by Seth MacFarlane, Cherry Chevapravatdumrong, David A. Goodman and Peter Shin – really gives only a little insight as to the process of making this special. MacFarlane isn’t even present for the whole thing, and announces about halfway through that he has somewhere to be, and leaves. The others all seem to have fun, and seem to all agree that the next spoof they really want to do is Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (in fact, they seem to like to talk about Star Trek an awful lot).

Other features include a half-hour video of four of the Family Guy family playing Star Wars Trivial Pursuit. While I did very well answering the questions presented (I only missed about four of them), it’s sad that this makes it as a DVD Special Feature. There are some animatics that show early stages of many of the scenes, with alternate jokes and extended takes, a feature where director Peter Shin shows you how to draw several of the characters in their Star Wars personas, “Making The Scene” which shows two of the scenes in animatic form alongside the finished version, and outtakes of the sock puppet. Yes, you heard me correctly, the goddamned sock puppet gets a feature.

I really have to be harsh here, and only give this DVD 2 out of 5 stars. The episode is weak, with unfunny jokes and running gags that run far too long. The specials are not worth the time. After having viewed Robot Chicken’s third Star Wars special on Adult Swim, I thought that this would be just as good. Alas, no. Save your money, because even die-hard Star Wars or Family Guy fans would be hard pressed to find this one worthwhile.

Family Guy: It's A Trap is out now.

IF YOU ENJOYED THIS ARTICLE, PLEASE HELP SUPPORT OUR SITE, AT NO COST WITH ONE CLICK ON THE FACEBOOK 'LIKE' BUTTON BELOW: